Thank you for your patience, I am much better now. That's the whole thing about having a mental health diagnosis: if you don't like your mood, just wait 5 minutes...I am back out of the insanity of the disease of alcoholism. Although, to touch a fine point it still has a hold of me. After all, I am still an alcoholic. The disease is still rampant, but I am not intaking it. I still have all my character defects, and a crazy mentality, but I settle back into routine.
And routine is the name of the game when it comes to someone with my disorders. Maybe you find it is so for you. Maybe not, but I feel you will understand.
Life breaks in right now. Ratty, one of the unicorn meat eating cats, has gotten desperate the herds have moved north, and has caught a bunny this morning. Usually, they like to play with their food, and I have a chance to catch and release. But not this morning. So the cats are happily disassembling the bunny to eat. It's happy for me that they haven't tried to bring it/him/her inside.
My friend, Exponential, called last night to make sure I was healthy, or not, for that matter. I appreciate her thoughtfulness, in this day of email and tweeting. I love to call people simply to hear the human voice, I feel less isolated that way. And I feel it is a simple enough process that not enough people are willing to indulge in, in this day. For most people, it is easier just to Tweet a status and walk away. Which abjures a responsibility in a relationship.
But bitching about an age of sound-bytes, ties me to all of history. Every writer craves communication. With Man, with Nature, with a God. It's not only writers, of course, that seek this, but I use that illustration because I am one, and it's something I know about. The whole process of Art is communication, and it's a good thing, too.
I harvested my lavender for a thoughtful friend, yesterday...even gardening is communication. The walk in the forest that I take, seeking my HP, my god, if you will, runs even into the field surrounding the forest. It flows like the stream, that runs in the middle of it. And it flowers with the blackberry vines, that seek the sun.
Today, on Thor's Day, there are dark skies, and the possibility to hear Thor's Hammer, in the thunder. Of course, Freya's Day, which is tomorrow is my favorite. She is the Norse goddess of orchards, tended plants and trees. Although I do love the wildness of a day with Thor riding the sky, the wind and the rain, I also love the tended garden...the flowering trees, and the herbs.
So enjoy this day of Thor, in whatever small corner of the world you live in. And I hope I will see you here tomorrow. I have missed you.